Saturday, January 7, 2012

Clone Wars Recap S4 E13: Escape from Kadavo!

Hey! What?! Clone Wars is back!? The series return kind of snuck up behind me and bludgeoned me with a... um... wamprat? When we last left Anakin and Co. before the Christmas break, they were suffering the consequences of a ridiculously stupid plan on the Planet of the Slaver Wolverines. Due to Anakin's idiotic plot and Obi Wan's uncharacteristically rash foolishness, Ahsoka was in a cage, Obi Wan was in a slave facility, and Anakin was the pet of a sexy queen. Wait... that last one doesn't sound too bad. OH! Now I understand his plan!
Okay... she's not that hot...
So the question with the new episode is: how are they going to get out of this mess? And perhaps, more importantly, how long is going to take them to erase their past mistakes? Join me after the jump to find out!



Okay first up, the episode clears up why the Slaver Wolverines need all these damn slaves in the first place! It's kind of a Temple of Doom scenario and they have an awful lot of red rocks that need moving from one place to another place, sometimes in a minecart. "Snap to it you, Slave Dogs, these red rocks aren't going to move themselves! I am growing uncomfortable about how that pile isn't quite as high as that pile and I would like some redistributed!"

Obi, who has been brutally beaten the last two episodes, is looking like absolute shit. He tries to lighten the mood by being foppish and British but his cruel Slaver Wolverine masters whip the crap out of a nearby Togrutan slave to shut Obi Wan up. If Obi Wan steps a whisker out of place then everybody else is going to suffer, so he's going to have to put his head down and move some frigging rocks.

Oh! And the villainous Count Dooku is back, sent on an errand by Darth Sidious himself, to check in on the slaving operation. Because Sith Empires are built upon the back of slaves. And their exposed, hungry spines tickle your feet.

Meanwhile that bum Anakin isn't really captured at all - he still even has his lightsaber. He's just chillin' with Queen slaver who offers to free his friends if he joins/beds her. Anakin's thinking about it.

Dooku prances in and confronts the Queen and she's pretty shocked to discover that he doesn't want the Jedi to be slaves, he wants them executed. Dooku totally chokes a bitch, but Anakin returns from finally freeing Ahsoka, bursts in, and tries to lightsaber duel Dooku with a glowing orange whip. Understandably he gets his ass kicked and has to retreat like a baby, clutching the dying Queen.


With the location of the slave facility where Obi Wan and the Togrutans are being processed is finally revealed (I think this was the goal of the long, convoluted plan all along), Anakin arrives for a rescue with a Republic fleet and bug-faced Jedi Plo Koon. All hell breaks loose and they shoot shit up in a pretty spectacular sky battle around the compound. 

The Wolverine Slaver Administrator thinks, "Forget this noize!" and he electrifies the walls of the slave chamber and starts removing the floor out from underneath them so they'll plummet to their deaths. But Ahsoka has the "brilliant" plan of flying a ship underneath to catch them. Seriously they praise her for how clever she is and she does a sickly smug grin. I swear that they would pat her on the back if she extended her hand and proudly declared, "I MADEZ A POOPY!"

Anyway the best, and probably most unsettling part, of all of this is that Anakin and Co. just don't give a damn anymore. Anakin is shown ruthlessly slicing up slavers with reckless abandon, and when Obi Wan finally confronts the cruel Administrator - and is mocked, "Jedi won't kill an unarmed foe" - badass Kiwi Commander Rex goes, "I'm no Jedi" and SUPRISE HARPOONZ him from the other side of the room. The moral of this episode is that killing your enemies solves everything. And it kind of made me wish that I had some enemies to murder myself.

Overall, it was a solid enough episode, although I think it's hard to return from the break with part three of a story in progress. I would have far preferred something new and fresh. We did get treated to a montage of upcoming episodes though and the Mandolorians (led by John Fauvreau) are back, along with Cad Bane and an assortment of other bounty hunters (I recall that supervising director Dave Filoni already let loose that Dengar will be in this series). And it's all building up the finale that will coincide with Phantom Menace 3D and feature the return of Darth Maul.

So lots to look forward to!

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