Friday, August 5, 2011

KOTOR: Jedi Consular Video is Bald and Beardy!

Elusive MMORPG Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic still doesn't have a release date, but that hasn't stopped the shifty folk at Bioware from releasing more video content. This time it's footage of the somber, rigid, humourless, sexually ambivalent Jedi Consular:

I'm super excited about this game (when it finally arrives) (and is actually available in my "region") (I'll punch you in the "region") but I don't think I'm going to be playing a Jedi Consular. I think I want to play a badass bounty hunter with flamethrower breath and jet-packs on every part of my body. And when I sneeze my helmet lights up red and shoots shurikens.

The big question that I have about this video though, is why would you choose to play a bald man with a beard? Isn't that something that real life thrusts upon you? Why would you want to incorporate that into your escapism? I've probably got that to look forward to in ten years anyway. No, no, no. When I play my Star Wars I want a giant seventies bouffant and amazing sideburns. When my bounty hunter helmet comes off there'll be so much hair spilling out of it you'll think I'm a wookiee. ARRRRROOOOOWRR.

What class are you going to play?


  1. Bounty hunter is a given because is so full of loosely defined ambiguous morality, but scoundrel also appeals to me. Whatever, I don't care I'ma goin' ta shoot you with a lazer, pew pew pew.

  2. For some reason I'm drawn to the Imperial Agents. They look more like Halo characters than Star Wars characters, but I think they'll be a lot of fun to play.

  3. Screw being a Jedi! I have always been into the Dark Side anyways. Hehe.

    <3 this blog :D

  4. Awesome! Dark side is definitely the way to go. I'll start with a bounty hunter, but then probably go a Sith because they get to choke people.

    J - I think Imperial Agents are the support/healer role, right? You'll be stuck like a pussy at the back handing out refreshments! No no no no.

  5. It's going to depend entirely on whether I look awesomer as a Jedi or Sith. This is very important.

  6. No way, I don't want to just heal people. Forget the Halo guys.