Monday, September 5, 2011

Superheroes, Sports and Subway

The new Justice League came out last week and it's being talked about in many places including right here on Fruitless Pursuits (here and here). My thoughts were that it wasn't the best Justice League story I've read. It wasn't even my favourite one from this year. The honour of that title goes to the following great story that appeared as a free insert in most DC comics earlier this year:

Let me present to you Justice League/Subway Famous Fans! 

It starts off in a Subway restaurant of course. This is pre-reboot so it's probably since been torn down and replaced with something a lot more young and extreme.

Panel One: Basketballman Blake Griffin becomes the first person to order something from Subway and not get asked 20 questions.
Panel Two: " good..." but he clearly hasn't taken a bite.
Panel Three: What's a 'Dunk Show'? Is that what they call Basketball games these days?
Panel Four: Subway meals make it so you can drive faster I guess.

So then they run into some of the Justice League battling Gorilla Grodd and some of his gorilla henchmen.

Panel One: Surely that "Thanks!" is sarcastic. "C'mon, you should get away from here. It isn't safe." Man in suit: "Yeah thanks but not only did I notice the gorillas but I am already getting these girls out of the way."

Panel One: He was gonna save throwing a basketball at a gorilla supervillain's face for the shooting contest? Is a shooting contest the same a dunk show?

Panel One: Now it's a 'Skills Contest'? 
Panel Three: They edited out the bit where the Racecar driver tells Green Lantern where all the sponsor stickers go on the car.

Panel One: Does that green glow mean Green Lantern is helping him cheat at the Skills Dunking and Shooting Contest? Or is it avocado power surging through his being?
Panel Two: "Finally we get to finish our awesome Subway sandwiches" What? Through the whole comic they've been saying it was so lucky they had their Subway but they didn't even finish their sandwiches? In fact,  no bites have even been taken out of them. What the heck?
Panel Three: Green Lantern, you look like such a creep here.

I still prefer this to the Jim Lee Justice League.


  1. Holy. Shit.

    You got this for free when I paid $4 for the other one?! I can't even begin to express how much better this is than the one I read.

    I think what Carl is actually implying is that he's driving a hybrid car fuelled with AWESOME Subway sandwiches. He probably got the idea after seeing Eddie Murphy stick a banana in a tailpipe.

  2. This is my favourite comics review ever!

  3. NOTE: This was part 2 of 4. In the fourth one Muhammad Ali's daughter teams up with Jared from Subway!

  4. This is so hilarious that I strained my brain muscles.

  5. Sounds like you need some avocado (the super food) for that brain.