Monday, December 17, 2012

Lego Star Wars Advent Calendar 2012, Day 17: FLASH. A-AAAAH!

It’s day 17 of our often tumultuous journey into the Lego Star Wars Advent Calendar filled with dizzying highs and crushing, child-confusing lows. Yesterday’s gift dragged us kicking and screaming back into wild and crazy Phantom Menace territory and I’m ever-fearful that today will do the same.

There’s Door #17. Deep breath. Watch my back. I’m going in. After the jump...

Another bag of tiny pieces. Two micro-vehicles in a row? Lego... you so sassy.

And this time it’s...


It might look to you like a clunky green nightmare version of Luke’s landspeeder in A New Hope and you’re kind of right. Except this is the speeder from Phantom Menace that the stoic Captain Panaka and co. jet around in like maniacs. (Well... actually it’s mostly just hanging around in the background). You remember this bugger... it looks like this...

They call it the Flash Speeder, because in times of peace the queen and her handmaidens will hoon around town in, flashing pedestrians. Sometimes they film a hologram of themselves flashing the guy at the drive-thru.

When Star Wars toy manufacturer, Hasbro, justifies the vehicles they put their time and money into making, they always assure us that they they need to produce “aggressive” action-orientated vehicles in order to appeal to children. This frog-green Flash Speeder doesn’t live up to those requirements by any stretch of the imagination so I’m guessing your children are sulking today. And maybe kicking you in the shins for good measure.

What would save this for me is if we received a minifig of the aforementioned, legendary, reliable, but-then-mysteriously-disappearing-in-Episode-2, Captain Panaka. Because he has an awesome hat for one. But I have a pretty strong feeling that it’s not going to happen. Sigh. Captain Panaka. Never forget.

In the ongoing competition between this calendar and the Playmobil Game of Thrones calendar, both offerings were a little underwhelming today. After much deliberation I’m afraid I must grudgingly side with Playmobil today because they gave us a rendition of humanity’s greatest invention, whereas Lego gave us a rendition of one of humanity’s five most embarrassing inventions. Advantage Playmobil.

Playmobil Game of Thrones Advent Calendar: 9
Lego Star Wars Advent Calendar: 8


  1. Really luke this choice was as bad as the stupid crow over the awesome star destroyer seriously playmobil gave you some stupid fire. FIRE for cryin out loud how is that better than a freaking flash speeder

    1. No way! My rationalisation was solid gold! Man's greatest achievement vs man's shittiest speeder! Case closed!

  2. My child is flying a green speeder all over the house! He seems perfectly happy.

  3. Lame-meter pegged! "Do you even want to build it?" ...."Nah, you can."
    I have no recollection of this scene, better be mini-figs from here on out....
    I feel we have taunted the Gods of Phenace with our praise of Hoth, they read this site and now they're making us pay.

  4. I concur, I have been wondering for a month what this frog-like thing was. I was thinking more along an Imperial Freighter from the X-Wing game from '95. Thanks!