Saturday, June 30, 2012

Review: Blind-Packaged The Avengers Heroclix!

I love the dizzying rollercoaster of emotions that is blind-packaging. I also love hyperbole. I love both these things A LOT. When you purchase something blind you get that gambler’s rush. Inside the package it could be Christmas, or alternatively it could be instant buyer’s remorse. A gold piece! A live scorpion! You never know what you’re going to get. So that's why I feel like Forrest Gump!

Okay, well in this case you’re pretty much guaranteed that you’re going to get an Avengers movie Heroclix but you don’t know which character. What is a Heroclix, you the casual reader enquire? It’s a miniature figure with rotating stats on its circular base designed for use in a tabletop strategy battle game that you’re probably never going to play. But regardless, miniature Avengers figures are fun enough by themselves, and who am I to resist more merchandise? Doesn’t this look fun? (Relatively speaking):


To find out what I got and what I thought, please join me... after the jump!

Firstly I will say that the bags are ridiculously big for the small figures that lurk inside. This is because there are large plastic blisters inside, which I guess is to stop you from cherry-picking the Hulk? 


And in addition to the figures, you also receive a character card explaining that character's specific powers. The problem, of course, is that these are also bent into the blister so they come out beat up and rolled like ancient scrolls...


Some of the ability names are pretty funny though. Nick Fury's willpower is called "Step Away From the Donut!" and Iron Man has "Throw a Little Race Car Red in There".

Speaking of Nick Muthafugging Snakes on a Quinjet Fury...


I realise that these look pretty simple in blown-up photos but do remember that these are really small (scale photo a little later). For the most part they actually look quite good in person. And I have to admit that the biggest appeal is the slot machine mentality of "Which figure am I going to get?" You're more stoked to get a character that you like than you are by the actual quality of the sculpt. 

Still, it's not a bad job on this scale. Do you know how hard it would be to paint pupils on faces this small? The factory workers were thrilled when it came to Nick Fury because they got a half day off!

Each figure is attached to a rotating base which has a window that shows off its stats. Each time it takes damage you rotate it the appropriate number of "clicks" and the stats and powers change. Some characters get weaker and others get stronger as they enrage. 

Now let's wash off the nerd-stink of that last paragraph with billionaire sex machine Iron Man!


It's the Mark VII (braclet armour) Iron Man in a great "Back the fuck off, Paltrow!" stance. Iron Man is always the best one so this was a bit of a score.


And then our third surprise figure?


It's bald-eagle-crying-in-front-of-an-American-flag-nevar-forgetz-mom-and-apple-pie wet blanket Captain America. My least favourite movie character, but there's no denying that the suit always looks bright and iconic. Good pose here too.


These are fragile though. Since photographing my Cap's right glove has fallen off, but it's nothing that a dab of super (powered) glue can't fix.

I also want to stress how lucky I was to get three actual team members (well, two plus Fury) because this set actually goes far deeper into the character roster. I'm aware that there's figures such as Tony Stark, Heimdall (the gatekeeper from Thor!), Frost Giants and Bucky Barnes! WTF?!

Here they are together...


And here they are with 3 3/4" Hallelujah Iron Man for scale...


Tiny right?

But wait! There's one more. The real reason for buying these packs is that I needed to acquire an Avengers movie Black Widow for my creepy focus collection. It seemed a lot more cost effective to grab her from eBay so I did just that.

Imagine my deep emotional scarring and disappointment when this showed up:


DID THEY EVEN WATCH THE MOVIE!? That's not even the right frigging haircut! This is clearly the absolute worst addition to the Creepy Black Widow Archive and a real let down. Hopefully they rectify this travesty against the delightful Ms. Johansson in a future set.

Have you picked up any of these? EB Games here in Australia have boxes of them on their counter. If you have, let us know what you got. I'm curious as to what's out there!

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