Saturday, December 7, 2013

Jurassic Park Playmobil Advent Calendar Day 7: Minecraft.

It's day 7 of our treacherous trek into the dark heart of the Jurassic Park Playmobil Advent Calendar where devilish deathosauruses lurk behind every trembling leaf, but are yet to actually emerge. Could today finally be the day when we are flanked and disembowelled by the cruel talon of a surprise raptor? Will we finally fulfil our week-long Christmas wish?

Let's gouge open Door Number 7 and find out for ourselves!...

And... it's... a...

A pick, a shovel, and an axe? What is this? Minecraft? Is our swarthy hero, Dr. Ian Goldblum, going to have to build a makeshift shelter and craft some torches to protect him from zombie stegasauruses throughout the night? We've been gearing up Goldblum all week now - I thought for sure we were ready for something big!

Still, Ian isn't one to look a gift axe in the shaft. Can you imagine the unbridled mayhem that could be achieved while hooning around on his blood-red hellcycle, The Heartvester, while recklessly dual-wielding an axe and a pick? You don't even have to imagine - it would look like this...


All Ian Goldblum wants to do now is skid underneath an oblivious diplodocus and instantaneously slit him from throat to dino-dong. Nothing says "Merry Christmas" like being soaked in dinosaur blood and screeching at the top of your lungs. Awesome.

And stay tuned because I'm popping open the Lego Star Wars advent calendar very soon!

No comments:

Post a Comment