Monday, December 16, 2013

Jurassic Park Playmobil Advent Calendar Day 16: Hear Me Roar.

It's day 16 of our sexual-tension-filled romp into the steamy jungles of the Jurassic Park Playmobil advent calendar, where our protagonist, Dr. Ian Goldblum, has been staring a raptor in the face for months now, wondering whether he should murder or make love to it. Well today all that nonsense is coming to an end!

Let's open Door Number 16 to find out why!

And... it's... a...

PRETTY LADY! Oh my word...

Well, this has clearly changed everything and has made our ongoing story infinitely more complicated.

Some backstory here. You remember how Laura Dern was in Jurassic Park? Well this interrupting lady is Laura Derp, Goldblum's estranged research assistant who he fell deeply in love (lust?) with a couple of years ago but she broke his heart. It was this overwhelming sadness that led him to isolate himself on the island, riding around on his blood-red hellcycle (The Heartvester) and symbolically tearing the hearts out of rampaging dinosaurs. For he too had felt like his own heart had been cruelly wrenched from his chest. It was this fit of deep despair that also led Goldblum to start practicing the dark arts which, as we know, led to that whole kerfuffle with Serpent Satan. 

Anyway, just when Goldblum was finally about to make his decision with the raptor, Laura Derp comes flitting back into his life and puts a stop to everything. "I was wrong, Ian," she whispers. "I'm not sure how I feel about you, exactly, but it's important we continue our research. Whatever that is." Goldblum breaks out into a cold sweat. How's all this going to turn out? I guess we'll soon know!

And don't wander too far because I'm just about to open up the Lego Star Wars calendar!

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